Unsettling signs

I don't remember the first time I noticed it. I know it has been months, probably most of her life. The nagging feeling was small at first, and was easy for me to brush off as a side effect of the rough start she had. Now though, it is impossible to ignore, and frankly, it scares me a little bit. There is something not right with Naomi.

With the exception of walking, Naomi has always been my "slow" child. She took her first steps at nine months, which was earlier than the others, but everything else she figured out slower than her older siblings. I thought nothing of it, and still don't really, as babies learn at there own pace. However, there are a few things she learned late (or even hasn't yet) that do concern me. She doesn't communicate with us. She doesn't wave, point, reach out to be picked up, and certainly does not talk. She will scream when she wants something (anything, really), but that is it. We have tried to get her to sign, and she looks at us like we are crazy. She does not like to make eye contact with most people-really only Daddy. She shuts down in crowds, and will just stare off into space like nobody is there. In fact, she does that a lot at home, too. She is finally starting to really play with toys, more than carrying them around and chewing on them, but that is a very recent thing now that she is almost 15 months. More than all of this, there is just something off with her. I really think I've known it a long time. She was hard to get to smile as a baby, and there are so many times that I try to look in her eyes, and she won't look back, and something is just... missing.

I talked to her pediatrician at one year, and he basically said because she had a few words (oh, and btw, she no longer uses all but five of those words, and only uses those five when you initiate it, like looking at her and saying "mamamamama", she will copy you), she could walk, and she would look at you and smile. I regret now not pushing the matter, not trusting my gut. He said she'd catch up, but now that almost another three months have gone by, and she is still not doing many of the things a child her age does, and is talking even less... I'm having doubts she will.

I can't help but wonder if her development has been slowed by her rough start. I know she did not get enough calories in the first six months of life, if not longer, due to all of her medical issues. My hope and prayer is that she was just slowed down a bit, and with some work we can overcome those obstacles. I'm quite sure most people who read this will know my biggest fear, though, and considering we have high suspicions that Rich has an undiagnosed case of Asperger's, the chance is higher.

I'm making an appointment, and praying I'll be taken seriously this time. I want to find out what is wrong with my baby, so we can work to improve it if possible, or at least so we can know and learn to care for her the way that she needs. Please be praying for us, and for little Naomi, that we can get to the bottom of this and figure out what exactly is going on.